Through the Eyes of a Delivery Goddess |
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This week marks a new era. The papers, for all intents and purposes, are merging, and one carrier will deliver both papers. Whichever paper had the highest circulation in a particular area those carriers would remain, and the carriers of the opponent paper would be looking for a new career. Harsh, but a reality of our ever evolving economy. A friend of mine took a new route that included a retirement village. These are folks who are older, but not in need of 24-hour assistance. In this particular facility, there are five floors of apartments, and the basement floor is a mall decorated with pubs, specialty shops, a general store, ethnic and cultural rooms like Kiwanis, Knights of Columbus, VFW and Owl clubs. There is a billiards room, a couple of burger shops and an elegant, candle-light dining experience, complete with a "garden room" that overlooks well groomed botanicals. Since it was her first day, I tagged along to provide comic relief. We were late - her first day trying to find 350 addresses in the dark took a bit longer than the veteran from whom she took the route. Many of the residents' doors were ajar, waiting to hear the "swoosh" of their paper hitting the hallway floor. One doorway had the top of the Tribune Review torn off and laying on the floor, Scotch© Taped to a note that said, "Tribune Review, July 30, Please!" My friend and I both read it, but could not really make any sense of it. The woman heard us talking outside of her door, and came to our rescue. First, she wanted to make sure we knew that she hadn't gotten a paper in the past three days. We checked our list, but she was not on our Tribune Review list, however she WAS on the Post Gazette list. The woman said this: Well, since I didn't get a paper for a few days, I called the Tribune office, and she told me I was dead. I told her that I was indeed, very much alive, and would still like to receive my paper. After scanning the records a bit longer, she said... well, actually ma'am, it says here that as of July 30 - thirty days from now - you'll BE deceased. I told her that I had no plans of dying just yet, but if that's the case, I had better live it up for the next month!! I don't want the Post Gazette... I'm mad at them! I'm friends with John McCain, and they bad-mouthed him, so I'm not reading their paper anymore.Now, it's bad enough to have a newspaper think you've passed away, but to know AHEAD OF TIME that you're GOING TO pass away?? Perhaps they should rent out their crystal ball!!? We assured her that we'd get it straightened out for her. When I called our Trib manager, apparently, 307-C had passed away, and whomever entered the information into the computer entered it under this woman, who lived in 307-A. Better get that crystal ball a tune-up! |